Today we'll be talking about some of the parts and pieces that make up a great wedding toast, as well as some things to avoid when either delivering a toast, or speaking to those whom you would like to give you a toast at your wedding.
The introduction: This can typically happen in a few different ways, a lot of which will be dictated by whom the bride and groom have chosen as their DJ. If he is a true Master of Ceremonies, he or she will set you up nicely before delivering your toast. In the case where he or she may not be handling those duties, you'll want to make sure that you open your toast by greeting the guests, thanking the bride and groom for giving you the honor of being a part of their day, and then introducing yourself to the guests, including how you know the couple. This is a great opportunity for you to transition into the next element of your toast.
To be, or not to be (funny) that is the question! Let's face it, there are some people in this world who can make people laugh, and almost make it seem effortless. Do you know why that is? It's because it comes natural for them. Some people are just funny people, most of which comes naturally for them. Comedy is all about timing, if you don't have it, don't try it! The bottom line here is this: If you're not a funny person, don't try to be! There's nothing wrong with you if you're not. Each of us have different personalities. Structure your toast to play to the strengths of your personality. Not only will the delivery be more genuine, but it will be a much better toast as well.
The skeletons in the closet: Everyone has them, right? One thing that they have in common, is that they were put there for a reason! It's one thing to reflect upon embarrassing things that you have done in your past in a small setting, but often times these are brought up at your wedding, and many times are completely inappropriate. Whether it's past relationships of either the bride or groom, or whatever the case may be, think carefully before bringing it up at their wedding. When delivering a toast, there is nothing wrong with having fun, even if a little bit (I stress the word "little" here) is at the Bride/Groom's expense. But if the story is going to make Grandma blush, maybe it's better left in the closet, where it belongs, wouldn't you agree?
Inside Jokes: It's inevitable that if you have asked someone to deliver a toast at your wedding, or if you are the one delivering the toast, that there will be many things that you have experienced together that are fond memories, some of which you'd love to share, and that is ok! When you are composing your toast, and deciding on which of those memories you'd like to share with everyone, ask yourself this question: If I bring this up at the wedding, is this something that is easily explained, and something that everyone in the room will be able to "get"? If not, it probably fits into the category of an "inside joke", and while it may be hilarious to the 4-5 of you who experienced it originally, by telling it at the wedding, you'll more than likely get zero response from the rest of the guests in attendance.
The Close: Every toast should have a close. This is where you'll want to offer the couple your congratulations, as well as asking the guests to raise their glass with you. The remainder of the close can be as simple as "If you would, please raise your glasses with me as we toast to the new Mr. and Mrs. *****. Or you can also add more of a creative, or personal element to it.
All things aside, just be yourself. I would encourage you to write your toast out on paper, and rehearse your delivery enough times to where you do not have to read it. If you can do that, you may stray from your original text, but that is perfectly ok. By doing this, more of it will come from the heart, and your delivery will be MUCH better than it will be by simply reading a script. You'll also be able to make eye contact, and connect with the guests, as well as the most important people in the room, the couple that you are toasting.
*This is a brief overview of a few ideas that you can incorporate into your toast, or even ideas that you can pass along to others who may be delivering a toast at yours or a friend's wedding in the future. For more information, please feel free to contact me, or visit my website at www.absolutesounddj.com.
Til next time!